Namo tassa Bhagavato Arahato Sammâ Sambuddhassa!
A BUDDHIST APPROACH TO DISENCHANTMENT 1
Origin: Dhamma Group • Version: 1.1 • Website: www.yahoogroups.com/group/dhamma
We all get sold the dream of the ‘happy life’ from a young age. We are indoctrinated by television, books, toys, parents, friends, educational institutions, society and culture about how to find this ‘happiness.’ We are told that to be truly happy one has to have a good job, a good family and all the ‘trappings’ that go with family life such as a house, car and other such belongings. But do these things really bring happiness? Well-instructed Buddhists take a different view.
A beautiful, kind, trustworthy and reasonable partner is sought by all. Yet how many people end up finding their ideal partner? Every relationship has its imperfections and incompatibilities. Even if the match is good, there is always the problem of changeability (anicca). People’s ideas, needs and likings change constantly and can give rise to friction and conflicts in relationships when these differ between the parties. Then there is the problem of impermanence of the physical form. The body undergoes changes over time and ages, weakens, deteriorates and becomes diseased, taking away all health, youthful looks and grace along with it. At the most, there are 25-35 years of ‘happiness’ to be gained from marriage after which one has to contend with the realities of sickness, old age and death. Almost all only come face to face with these realities after marriage.
No marriage would be complete without adorable and obedient children. Children are desired, but the realities of having children become apparent only after their arrival. From the day that children are born, they are a source of suffering for parents. They cry and keep parents awake as babies and they go out and keep their parents awake as young adults. They get sick and need to be treated, they need to be schooled, educated and prepared for life. It’s worse when children don’t listen to parents and get into all kinds of trouble - again it is the parents that suffer. All in all, raising a child is a 25-30 year life commitment fraught with difficulty, stress and struggle.
No family would be complete without a mansion, two family cars and perhaps a boat or an investment property in addition to the various trappings such as televisions, DVD players, a fridge, a washing machine, computers, clothes, etc. A house that is bigger, better and has more facilities than others’ is desired by many: ‘A house to beat all houses.’ However to get such a house is not easy and requires a considerable monetary deposit and a commitment of around 25-30 years of one’s life to repay the large bank loan. So much suffering for something that will eventually be left behind. Then there are the belongings that go out of date on the very day that they are bought. A car for example is source of great suffering as it gets scratched, battered, bruised, broken and in need of constant servicing over time. A similar situation exists for all other belongings.
To support a spouse, children, house and belongings, one needs a good job.2 The suffering starts with the training at an institution such as a university for several years. This is then followed by employment as a trainee, progressing to an intermediate, senior and management levels. In all these levels there is suffering to be experienced in various ways. There is about 25-35 years of struggle at various work places, working with people that one dislikes or disagrees with, doing work that one does not wish to do, being managed by people one does not wish to be managed by, working in a company one does not wish to work in, etc. There is also the constant work politics that one needs to deal with while struggling to climbing the employment ladder.
It becomes apparent from the above, that the life of a lay person is filled with struggle, stress and suffering. Yet people seek the lay life, get caught up and relish it.3 Why is this? This is because all these things; a spouse, children, houses, cars, and other belongings, are a source of pleasure. They please the six senses of eye, ear, nose, tongue, body and mind, with pleasant sights (e.g. of children), pleasant sounds (e.g. their voices), pleasant odours (e.g. their smell), pleasant flavours (e.g. food), pleasant tactile sensation (e.g. of a touch) and pleasant ideas (e.g. thinking ‘I have these things’). This is why lay people seek out these avenues of hidden stress, suffering and unsatisfactoriness cleverly disguised as ‘happiness;’ because they also give rise to pleasure (which is changeable thereby causing stress as an end result). So people are stuck in a maze of suffering, holding suffering with both hands, while thinking they are ‘happy.’ The Lord Buddha has warned that the pleasures to be gained from sensual avenues are little to none, give rise to greater pain (due to changeability - anicca) and thus should be abandoned in favour of the final goal of Nibbana.4
Lay life is full of suffering but only few realize this. Incompatibilities of ideas, interests and likings between partners can give rise to much stress and conflict. Parents suffer and struggle from the day that children are born by raising, schooling and looking after them. Belongings give little satisfaction but mostly give rise to unsatfactoriness and stress. There is the need to struggle and work to support one’s family and belongings. Then there is the ultimate suffering of sickness, old age and death, where one has to leave behind all that one has worked for 25-35 years of one’s life including spouse, children, job, houses, cars, money and all other belongings. So it is better to stop delaying any further, realize the danger that one is in and work towards the final goal of the deathless Nibbana.
May you realize the trap that you are caught in and find the strength to attain the lasting peace of Nibbana!
KAMA SUTTA – SENSUAL PLEASURE 5
If one, longing for sensual pleasure,
achieves it, yes,
he's enraptured at heart.
The mortal gets what he wants.
But if for that person
— longing, desiring —
the pleasures diminish,
he's shattered,
as if shot with an arrow.
Whoever avoids sensual desires
— as he would, with his foot,
the head of a snake —
goes beyond, mindful,
this attachment in the world.
A man who is greedy
for fields, land, gold,
cattle, horses,
servants, employees,
women, relatives,
many sensual pleasures,
is overpowered with weakness
and trampled by trouble,
for pain invades him
as water, a cracked boat.
So one, always mindful,
should avoid sensual desires.
Letting them go,
he'd cross over the flood
like one who, having bailed out the boat,
has reached the far shore.
Notes
1. The latest version of this document can be found in HTML format here http://www.vihara.org.au/go?to=disench and in PDF format here http://www.vihara.org.au/go?to=disenchp
2. Please note that there are different levels in the practice of the Dhamma. While it is better to have a good education and job than to not have any at all, it is imminently much better to be free of even a good job, etc as they all ultimately bring unsatfactoriness and stress. So the ultimate goal of all true Buddhists is Nibbana.
3. Refer to Appendix A: Delight below.
4. Refer to Appendix B: To Potaliya below for the Lord Buddha’s warning about sensual pleasures, or pleasures that please the eye, ear, nose, tongue, body and mind.
5. See Sutta Nipata 4.1, Kama Sutta, Sensual Pleasure here http://www.accesstoinsight.org/tipitaka/kn/snp/snp.4.01.than.html
Appendix A: Delight
Translated from the Pali by Thanissaro Bhikkhu
PTS: S i 107
CDB: i 200
Source: Access to Insight edition © 1998. Transcribed from a file provided by the translator.
Copyright: © 1998 Thanissaro Bhikkhu.
URL: http://www.accesstoinsight.org/tipitaka/sn/sn04/sn04.008.than.html
For free distribution. This work may be republished, reformatted, reprinted, and redistributed in any medium. It is the author's wish, however, that any such republication and redistribution be made available to the public on a free and unrestricted basis and that translations and other derivative works be clearly marked as such.
Translator's note: In this discourse, Mara and the Buddha are speaking different languages. By "acquisitions" Mara means one's family and physical possessions. The Buddha uses the same word to mean a sense of possession for anything — physical or mental — at all.
I have heard that on one occasion the Blessed One was staying near Savatthi in Jeta's Grove, Anathapindika's monastery. Then Mara the Evil One went to the Blessed One and recited this verse in his presence:
Those with children
delight
because of their children.
Those with cattle
because of their cows.
A person's delight
comes from acquisitions,
since a person with no acquisitions
doesn't delight.
[The Buddha:]
grieve
A person's grief
doesn't grieve.
Then Mara the Evil One — sad & dejected at realizing, "The Blessed One knows me; the One Well-Gone knows me" — vanished right there.
Appendix B: To Potaliya
PTS: M i 359
Source: Access to Insight edition © 2003. Transcribed from a file provided by the translator.
Copyright: © 2003 Thanissaro Bhikkhu.
URL: http://www.accesstoinsight.org/tipitaka/mn/mn.054x.than.html
...
"Suppose a dog, overcome with weakness & hunger, were to come across a slaughterhouse, and there a dexterous butcher or butcher's apprentice were to fling him a chain of bones — thoroughly scraped, without any flesh, smeared with blood. What do you think: Would the dog, gnawing on that chain of bones — thoroughly scraped, without any flesh, smeared with blood — appease its weakness & hunger?"
"No, lord. And why is that? Because the chain of bones is thoroughly scraped, without any flesh, & smeared with blood. The dog would get nothing but its share of weariness & vexation."
"In the same way, householder, a disciple of the noble ones considers this point: 'The Blessed One has compared sensuality to a chain of bones, of much stress, much despair, & greater drawbacks.' Seeing this with right discernment, as it actually is, then avoiding the equanimity coming from multiplicity, dependent on multiplicity, he develops the equanimity coming from singleness, dependent on singleness,1 where sustenance/clinging for the baits of the world ceases without trace.
"Now suppose a vulture, a kite, or a hawk, seizing a lump of flesh, were to take off, and other vultures, kites, or hawks — following right after it — were to tear at it with their beaks & pull at it with their claws. What do you think: If that vulture, kite, or hawk were not quickly to drop that lump of flesh, would it meet with death from that cause, or with death-like pain?"
"Yes, lord."
"In the same way, householder, a disciple of the noble ones considers this point: 'The Blessed One has compared sensuality to a lump of flesh, of much stress, much despair, & greater drawbacks.' Seeing this with right discernment, as it actually is, then avoiding the equanimity coming from multiplicity, dependent on multiplicity, he develops the equanimity coming from singleness, dependent on singleness, where sustenance/clinging for the baits of the world ceases without trace.
"Now suppose a man were to come against the wind, carrying a burning grass torch. What do you think: If he were not quickly to drop that grass torch, would he burn his hand or his arm or some other part of his body, so that he would meet with death from that cause, or with death-like pain?"
"In the same way, householder, a disciple of the noble ones considers this point: 'The Blessed One has compared sensuality to a grass torch, of much stress, much despair, & greater drawbacks.' Seeing this with right discernment, as it actually is, then avoiding the equanimity coming from multiplicity, dependent on multiplicity, he develops the equanimity coming from singleness, dependent on singleness, where sustenance/clinging for the baits of the world ceases without trace.
"Now suppose there were a pit of glowing embers, deeper than a man's height, full of embers that were neither flaming nor smoking, and a man were to come along — loving life, hating death, loving pleasure, abhorring pain — and two strong men, grabbing him with their arms, were to drag him to the pit of embers. What do you think: Wouldn't the man twist his body this way & that?"
"Yes, lord. And why is that? Because he would realize, 'If I fall into this pit of glowing embers, I will meet with death from that cause, or with death-like pain.'"
"In the same way, householder, a disciple of the noble ones considers this point: 'The Blessed One has compared sensuality to a pit of glowing embers, of much stress, much despair, & greater drawbacks.' Seeing this with right discernment, as it actually is, then avoiding the equanimity coming from multiplicity, dependent on multiplicity, he develops the equanimity coming from singleness, dependent on singleness, where sustenance/clinging for the baits of the world ceases without trace.
"Now suppose a man, when dreaming, were to see delightful parks, delightful forests, delightful stretches of land, & delightful lakes, and on awakening were to see nothing. In the same way, householder, a disciple of the noble ones considers this point: 'The Blessed One has compared sensuality to a dream, of much stress, much despair, & greater drawbacks.' Seeing this with right discernment, as it actually is, then avoiding the equanimity coming from multiplicity, dependent on multiplicity, he develops the equanimity coming from singleness, dependent on singleness, where sustenance/clinging for the baits of the world ceases without trace.
"Now suppose a man having borrowed some goods — a manly carriage, fine jewels, & ear ornaments — were to go into the market preceded & surrounded by his borrowed goods, and people seeing him would say, 'How wealthy this man is, for this is how the wealthy enjoy their possessions,' but the actual owners, wherever they might see him, would strip him then & there of what is theirs. What do you think: Should the man rightly be upset?"
"No, lord. And why is that? The owners are stripping him of what is theirs."
"In the same way, householder, a disciple of the noble ones considers this point: 'The Blessed One has compared sensuality to borrowed goods, of much stress, much despair, & greater drawbacks.' Seeing this with right discernment, as it actually is, then avoiding the equanimity coming from multiplicity, dependent on multiplicity, he develops the equanimity coming from singleness, dependent on singleness, where sustenance/clinging for the baits of the world ceases without trace.
"Now suppose that, not far from a village or town, there were a dense forest grove, and there in the grove was a tree with delicious fruit, abundant fruit, but with no fruit fallen to the ground. A man would come along, desiring fruit, looking for fruit, searching for fruit. Plunging into the forest grove, he would see the tree... and the thought would occur to him, 'This is a tree with delicious fruit, abundant fruit, and there is no fruit fallen to the ground, but I know how to climb a tree. Why don't I climb the tree, eat what I like, and fill my clothes with the fruit?' So, having climbed the tree, he would eat what he liked and fill his clothes with the fruit. Then a second man would come along, desiring fruit, looking for fruit, searching for fruit and carrying a sharp axe. Plunging into the forest grove, he would see the tree... and the thought would occur to him, 'This is a tree with delicious fruit, abundant fruit, and there is no fruit fallen to the ground, and I don't know how to climb a tree. Why don't I chop down this tree at the root, eat what I like, and fill my clothes with the fruit?' So he would chop the tree at the root. What do you think: If the first man who climbed the tree didn't quickly come down, wouldn't the falling tree crush his hand or foot or some other part of his body, so that he would meet with death from that cause, or with death-like pain?"
"In the same way, householder, a disciple of the noble ones considers this point: 'The Blessed One has compared sensuality to the fruits of a tree, of much stress, much despair, & greater drawbacks.' Seeing this with right discernment, as it actually is present, then avoiding the equanimity coming from multiplicity, dependent on multiplicity, he develops the equanimity coming from singleness, dependent on singleness, where sustenance/clinging for the baits of the world ceases without trace.
1. Samyutta Nikaya 4.8, Nandana Sutta, Delight see http://www.accesstoinsight.org/tipitaka/sn/sn04/sn04.008.than.html
2. Majjhima Nikaya 54, Potaliya Sutta, To Potaliya (excerpt) see http://www.accesstoinsight.org/tipitaka/mn/mn.054x.than.html
3. Samyutta Nikaya 5.1, Alavika Sutta, Sister Alavika see http://www.accesstoinsight.org/tipitaka/sn/sn05/sn05.001.than.html
4. Sutta Nipata 4.1, Kama Sutta, Sensual Pleasure see http://www.accesstoinsight.org/tipitaka/kn/snp/snp.4.01.than.html
5. Majjhima Nikaya 22, Alagaddupama Sutta, The Water-Snake Simile see
http://www.accesstoinsight.org/tipitaka/mn/mn.022.than.html#t-1
1. Offerings - On making offerings to the Lord Buddha's supreme qualities, see http://www.vihara.org.au/go?to=offerings
2. Daily Dana - On giving and generosity, see http://www.vihara.org.au/go?to=dailydana
3. Five Precepts - Developing virtue through the five precepts, see http://www.vihara.org.au/go?to=pansil
4. Work Stress - An analysis of stress in the work-place, see http://www.vihara.org.au/go?to=workstress
5. Consequences - About being responsible for our actions (kamma) and their consequences (vipaka), see
http://www.vihara.org.au/go?to=conseq
6. Make Haste - About the dangers of samsara (endless round of birth and death), see
http://www.vihara.org.au/go?to=urgency
7. Delusion - Covers the three unwholesome roots of action including delusion (moha), see http://www.vihara.org.au/go?to=moha
8. A Buddhist Approach to Disillusionment - A Buddhist approach to seeing past the trickery and into reality, see
http://www.vihara.org.au/go?to=disill
9. Attachment - An analysis of how attachment leads to unsatisfactoriness, see http://www.vihara.org.au/go?to=attachment
10. One Hour of Unsatisfactoriness - The unsatisfactoriness that can be felt within the space of an hour, see
http://www.vihara.org.au/go?to=onehour
11. A Buddhist Approach to Mental Health - A Buddhist perspective and approach to mental health, see
http://www.vihara.org.au/go?to=mentalhealth
12. Four Noble Truths - The essence of Buddhism, see http://www.vihara.org.au/go?to=fourtruths
13. Noble Eightfold Path - The path for ending stress and suffering, see http://www.vihara.org.au/go?to=noblepath
1. AccessToInsight.org here http://www.accesstoinsight.org
2. Mettanet.org here http://www.mettanet.org
3. What-Buddha-Said.net here http://what-buddha-said.net
4. What-Buddha-Taught.net here http://what-buddha-taught.net
5. SuttaReadings.net here http://www.suttareadings.net
6. Buddhanet.net here http://www.buddhanet.net
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